This past week has been challenging for me. I am here in the 700 year old stone house in the mountain village. I feel isolated because I don't know people here and I don't speak the language, and I haven't felt motivated to change either of those things. There are 2 buses a day to town, but I haven't felt like going. My back and legs are mostly OK, with the occasional muscle spasm in my low back or a hip, and I just don't want to be somewhere in pain unable to move well waiting hours for a bus. That is my own self imposed limitation. I really have grown weary of travel and adventure, and am enjoying "staying put." I'd like to be staying put with friends around though. My own social weirdness exists...really loving many people and enjoying them, and at the same time craving and enjoying solitude to the point of having too much of it right now...anyway, you get the picture.
I know that "wherever I go there I am" and so I bring my own mental processes with me. I tend to engage in dilemma thinking, what should I do, which of the infinite options is the right one? Should I stay in Europe or move to Israel because they are not the US (a place that seems increasingly fucked politically) or should I go home, because North America really is home. I booked a ticket back to the US, so unless something changes that's what I'll do.
I keep reading various websites with news, commentary etc. and the degree of political decrepitude that dominates the US government is appalling, no longer surprising, very disappointing. Really I think Washington DC should be walled off. Let the politicians eat each other alive, and let us be done with them. What an amazingly corrupt group. There are so many morally spiritually underdeveloped people who are drawn to power and who are unfit for power. I don't even need to name names here.
Human drama...thousands of years of it and still the wheel turns and we are on it. Aren't we tired of this yet??
P.S. It's quite a bundle of realities we've got going here ain't it?
17 July 2008
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